Forgiveness
by Silver Fists
Summary: Just a quickie based on Papa Roach's "Decompression period"


[Here today gone today 

Hurry up and wait 

I'm never there for you or me 

Can't you read the story of our lives? 

Death to me and life for you 

Something isn't right. 

And I need some space tp 

clear my head to think 

about my life.] 

The wood tips of a pair of old crutches softly tapped on the cobblestones as they carried their owner on her path to nowhere in particular. The girl walked slowly, her shoulders hunched, and gray-blue eyes out of focus. Her long, curly, brown hair framed her round face from beneath a black cabby hat. She wearily shuffled her feet in their high black boots, her navy pants tucked into them. She paused for a moment, roughly wiping stray, and unwanted tears, out of her eyes with a gloved hand. 

[And I can't be alone.] 

The girl continued her slow wander. She wanted to add as much distance as she possibly could between herself and the lodging house she had called home. 

[I just need some space 

to clear my head to think about 

my life 

with or without you.] 

"Silver Fists, dis is gettin to be too much. You know dat nobody would hurt use, yet you still insist on dese charades! Petite, I love you, but..." his voice shook with regret. 

Silver looked at the strong-jawed face, trying to catch a glimpse of the thoughts in his green-brown eyes. She came closer to him, praying he would not voice what was on his mind, but she was too late. 

"I love you, but I t'ink it would be better for both of us t' go our own separate ways...maybe den you'll realize it ain't good to be so paranoid." he finally finished, his normally gentle voice turning to cold steel. 

Silver Fists did not know what to do, did she hear correctly, or was it just her imagination? 

No, it had been real. Cajun had told her those words just twenty agonizing minutes ago, after which, the girl took off. Her first reaction was of confused anger, but now it had turned into painful realization. 

Silver Fists took a deep breath and heavily threw herself at a nearby brick wall. She had stopped crying, her eyes simply glazed over, as she slid down the wall to the cold ground. 

[We fight it out, 

We work it out 

Give me some time to unwind] 

It was not a plain fight, that just would be forgotten the next morning. 

[I must confess 

I'm falling apart 

Breaking your heart 

Crying with you on the phone. 

We're walking on thin ice, 

I hope it doesn't break.]

The past two years of being a newsie flashed in Silver's mind. Cajun was in almost every single one of those memories. 

She remembered how she had rejected his love, afraid of him getting hurt, or dying. How paranoid and stupid had she been! Blind to how difficult she made life for both of them, pushing her only love away. It was all her fault Cajun had finally given up. 

[Mile by mile we're farther apart 

and it's one empty bottle 

and two broken heart. 

Night after night we are falling apart 

now it's two broken bottles 

and four empty hearts.] 

No other man would make her feel the same. Any other relationship would just be empty. Would it be the same for Cajun, would her mistake have the same impact on him? 

[Decompression 

depression period] 

Silver scowled at herself. She recognized the ugly emptiness forming inside her. She remembered the growing feeling of depression, making her want to hurt something, most likely herself. 

"And I can't be alone" she whispered, musing as life crept back into her eyes. 

With butterflies in her stomach and heart aching with hope and worry, Silver Fists struggled back to her feet. As quickly as possible, she made her way back to the lodging house. 

When she burst through the front door, she was completely out of breath. Not far away, her newsie friends sat around on various pieces of old furniture, talking and playing cards. Cajun sat on a chair in a dim corner near the group. All eyes turned to Silver when she walked in and the room fell silent. 

Silver Fists held her head high as she walked toward Cajun. He got up and met her halfway on her path. 

"Remy, I'm sorry" she whispered almost drowned out by the loud whoops and cheers of her friends as she grabbed his face with her gloved hands and passed her lips over his. 


End file.
